The Last Days...

I decided today that if I did not sit down and do this post it was not going to get done. I hope I have not become so overwhelmed at this point that I have forgotten everything! 2 after midnight nights this weekend with busy days have left me exhausted today so as I "rest" tonight and re-fuel for what lies ahead I will attempt this post.

Though this is actually not our last days of seminary, it is the last days of seminary as we know it. I am ready for A to not have class. I am more than ready for Greek to be out of our marriage! However, it is not because this has been a terrible experience. These last 5 1/2 years have been wonderful. I did not say easy, but the time as a whole has been a wonderful time of growth for us in so many ways. I remember when we first shared our feelings of being led to come here for Seminary a lot of people said to us, "can't you just go to an extension site somewhere?" Yes, we could have but that is not what we were called to do. We were called here and we needed this whole experience. The training for full time ministry is SO much more than what Aaron has learned in classes. The Lord needed to humble us, He needed us to learn to depend on Him more, He needed us to change our focus, He needed us to realize that many of the "things" we thought important are not important at all, He needed us to draw closer as a couple, He needed us to view parenting differently, He needed us out of our comfort zones (especially me), and many many other things He needed from us. He still needs much more and we have far from perfected any of the areas I mentioned but our time here has forced us to work on all of these areas. So, in these last days I reflect on what our time here has done to change us and pray that we NEVER forget this time.

I also remember being told by those who had been to Seminary that we would create friends who last forever. I never imagined just how true this was. In these last days I think of how not only did we walk through the tough times of Seminary with these friends but now we move on to our ministry knowing that those are friends we can still confide in when no one else understands. I think of how we are forced to be "real" with those friends and them with us and you just can't touch friendships like that. We have friends all over the world and thankfully with technology we are able to stay in touch and I am forever greatful for the one of a kind frienships we have. We also have many friends who we made while here (not Seminary affiliated) and I am very thankful for them as well. You need those friends also when you are just tired of talking about Seminary and all that it involves! The Lord knows what we need and he provides.

In these last days I think about how much I will miss Fort Worth. We love Fort Worth! It is larger than what we are used to but we have gotten so accustomed to the conveniences and there is always something to do and well, we just really like it here. Especially in the last few weeks with everything I do I think of how these are "last". As I drive by Starbucks that is about 2 min from our house I think about the distance that will be between me and Starbucks once we move!!! As we run out to get whatever we may be out of or "run" to this store or that store I am reminded that my life is about to change big time!

In these last days I think about the fact that we came here with 2 girls and we leave here with 4! Thank you Lord! Talk about changing our lives!!!

In these last stressful days I think about the way our marriage has grown. I think about how much more I respect my husband, not because he did not deserve my respect before but because the Lord as I said before used this time to draw us closer than ever and to make us realize the time we have to invest in our marriage. I think about how we have learned to make time for each other despite school and jobs and church and 4 girls. If that is as simple as having a cup of coffee together after the girls are in the bed, it is time together and it is important. I pray we never forget the many things God has revealed to us about our marriage in this time and that we continue to draw closer to each other through Him every day.

I think about the spiritual growth I have seen in Elleigh. I have no idea what the Lord has planned for her but because of the experiences she has been able to be a part of here and her openness to those opportunities she has developed spiritually in an amazing way. Once again, praise God!

I think about the wonderful doctors, therapists, etc that God has given to us for Sallie. I remember telling Aaron, "we can't move, all of Sallie's doctors are here" I am brought to tears just thinking of how our Lord has worked out the many details of medical caretakers for Sallie. As always, He was faithful to provide!

I think about the MANY supporters we have had. We have felt and continue to feel the prayers. The provisions that came from God through so many generous individuals will never be forgotten. The Lord has blessed us over and over and over through His people!

In these last days I think A LOT about what lies ahead. There is a wonderful peace that comes from knowing you are doing what God has called you to do. Our move here was by far the largest leap of faith for us and I know now what it means to truly do what God calls you to do. So, I do not worry about what lies ahead but that doesn't mean I am not anxious. I am already "the preacher's wife" but I am about to become a full time "preacher's wife" and "pk mom" and I admit that is a little scary for me! I think about all that I have to learn, I think about the many ways I have to let God have complete control, I think about the effects this will have on our girls, I think about the support I have to give to my husband while helping him minister to the people we have been called to serve with, I think of whether I can do this and be good at it. I think about God's perfect timing. A few weeks ago I saw that Lisa McKay (The Preacher's Wife blog) had written a new book "You Can Still Wear Cute Shoes" I thought I do not have time to read right now but A went by the bookstore and got it for me and I have read it. It is a quick read and I read a lot in the car. It is great! I needed it and I needed it now! For all my minister's wife friends-GET IT! I think I will try and read it once a year.

These are just a few of the things that spin through this crazy mind of mine in these last days but all of them go back to one thing: God has been and continues to be faithful to us and He teaches us more about Him and ourselves through our life experiences.

Through all these thoughts, this pic of Millie sums up the way we all feel in these last days!!! A little frazzled!

BRIGHT

We love this time of year! I think this year with the winter we had we love it even more! Everything just seems so full of color and BRIGHT!

Today was stripes and polka dots day at Discovery School and we happened to get a package in the mail yesterday from Nanna and Grandy and these dresses were included. Love the BRIGHT stripes. So, after I got them dressed (and while I was getting dressed) I sent Elleigh out in the backyard to take some pics of them in their BRIGHT dresses. As you can see they became very animated in the BRIGHT sunshine and I love the BRIGHT green leaves behind them!

Maybe not so BRIGHT faces here!

Hope you all are enjoying the BRIGHTness of this time of year!

"Not Now"

For the past month it has been on my mind to do a "last days" post and for one reason after another I never accomplished it but I had told myself that I was for sure going to do it this week. I wanted to document what these last days felt like. By last days I mean last days in Fort Worth and everything related to being here, last days in this house, last days before becoming a full time pastor's wife, and last days of Seminary. Normally when I have the urge to post something I just do it. Maybe not right away but fairly quickly because I know if I don't get it done soon it will not get done. This however was different. I would think about it every day and how I never wanted to forget this time, yet I would never sit down and actually do the post. I now know why I could not do that post. These are the last days of everything I listed except one. Last week Aaron found out that he is not going to graduate. He is not going to pass his last Greek class. So, these are not our last days of Seminary. We are beyond disappointed and have ask and continue to ask ourselves and God a lot of questions but we ultimately know that God is in control and that He allowed this to happen for a reason. We both have seen this happen to others and I always said, "I can't imagine!" Well, now I can and I never imagined just how heartbreaking it really is but it has shifted my focus. God has already revealed so much to us through this experience. We are still going to Red Springs in May as planned. For many reasons, this has confirmed our decision to be there. Aaron told them last week and they have gone above and beyond to support us and to encourage us and they know that we are who God has for their church and they want us full time in May just as planned. Praise God! Red Springs is a small country church and not what we had envisioned for us but know God has called us there, have a great vision for what God is going to do there, and truly believe we could search the world over and NEVER find a group of people so loving and good to us. We are unsure at this point when A will re-take the class. There is a good possibility it will not be offered again until next Spring. We have been through many ups and downs since we found out and we greatly appreciate your prayers. Lots of tears and lots of pride issues to deal with are just a few of the emotions we have dealt with. I have looked so forward to celebrating graduation and feel like that time has been ripped away but as always it's not about us and what we want. I can hardly stand to see my husband hurt or struggle, especially when I know the sacrifiices he has made and how much he gives to do what he feels God is calling him to do and for our family. Our prayer is that this experience just as any trial most importantly draws us closer to God, closer to each other as a couple, closer as a family, better equipped for the ministry God has called us to, will remind us more than ever to give it all to Him and not try to do things in our own power (that never works!), and that we do not allow Satan to use this! Also, I would ask for prayers to open A's mind when it comes to Greek like only God can. He has never struggled academically with anything and he really does with this which is very frustrating for him. So, now that I have all that out and am slowly but surely working through these emotions my "last days" post will follow soon! We appreciate your prayers and are very grateful for the wonderful friends and family who God has given to us. It makes it so much easier when the people in your life are supportive and show how much they care for us. The kind words, hugs, phone calls, listening ears, and the list goes on have all been comforting! The Lord knows our hearts and our desires but sometimes he says, "not now."

Easter 2010

These are somewhat out of order but here they are. The pics from Sunday morning were not very good. The sun was really bright and the wind was very strong so this was about as good as it gets but the girls are really cute! Click pic to get a better look!

How cute is she (who by the way has an individual picture because she will cooperate)?!

Easter egg hunt after church

Not interested in taking pics when the horse behind our house is coming to the fence

Smile!

Decorating our bunny cake

He was bright and full of m&ms

Dying eggs with Daddy

Making Resurrection cookies

"Look what the Easter bunny brought us!"

HAPPY EASTER!

"He told them, "This is what is written: The Christ will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance and forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations beginning at Jerusalem." Luke 24:46-47

As much as I love all that comes with Easter and all the fun we are planning to have celebrating in the next few days my hope is that I never forget what these days truly mean and that we teach our girls the importance of Easter and how much Christ loves us.